Grounded · Week 5 · 24 min read
What is a Disciple?
A disciple is not just a believer. A disciple is a follower.
In this lesson:
The word disciple may sound a little strange, but it simply means learner or follower. This week we’re going to look at what it really means to be a disciple of Jesus. Not just in belief, but in practice. We’ll talk about the cost of following Him. We’ll look at what spiritual growth looks like. We’ll look at how to share your faith naturally and not be weird. And we’ll look at what it means to live a life that is worthy of the calling you have received.
Matthew 28:19-20 (NIV) 19 “Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, 20 and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”
These are some of the last words Jesus spoke to His followers before ascending to heaven. They are not just an invitation; they are the mission. However, in order to make disciples, you have to first be a disciple.
1. On Being a Disciple
We need to understand what a disciple is.
The best way to fully understand this is to know how this worked in Jesus’s day. Picture a boy growing up in a village like Nazareth. By the time he could walk and talk, he was already learning Scripture. Not as homework, but as part of his everyday life. His parents spoke Scripture over him. The synagogue may have helped train him. It’s like when you and I were using flash cards to learn multiplication tables. These boys were memorizing entire books of the Torah. (What is the Torah? The first five books of the Bible.)
While that was happening, every Jewish boy was also learning a trade. It was a father’s sacred responsibility. The rabbis had a saying that a father who did not teach his son a trade was teaching him to steal. So, a boy learned Torah and he learned to work with his hands. Both. Even the greatest teachers of that day had a trade. The Apostle Paul studied under one of the most respected rabbis in Israel, and he still made tents for a living (Acts 18:3). Torah in the mind. Tools in the hand.
A small number of boys went further. The ones who had the opportunity would seek out a respected teacher and beg to follow him. All so they could become his disciple, or student, known in that time as his Talmid.
Following a rabbi was not going to class, sitting in a classroom taking notes. It was uprooting your life, leaving everything and everyone to follow the teacher everywhere. You watched how he prayed. How he treated people. How he ate, how he rested, how he handled an insult. The goal was to become like him. To live the way, he lived. They used an old saying that a disciple should be covered in the dust of his rabbi, because he walked so close on the road behind him.
In that world, the student chased the teacher. You proved yourself. You needed the ability, the opportunity, and the connections. But when Jesus came, He flipped the whole system. He walks up to ordinary fishermen. Men the great teachers never came looking for. Men who were living the life everyone expected them to live, working the nets, running the family business, assuming the door to something more had never been open to them in the first place. And Jesus says two words. Follow me. He chose them. He wanted them. And He still does that today. He is not looking for the most qualified person in the room. He is looking for the one who will say yes to Him, get up, leave the fishing nets behind, and walk close enough to get covered in His dust.
So, when Jesus came into the lives of the men who would be His disciples, dreams that were dead became alive again. It would have been like a recruiter from a professional sports team came knocking on your door one day and told you that your life was about to change, so pack your bags and let’s go. Can you imagine their excitement?
This is why they left careers. They left families. They left comfort. (Read Matthew 4:18-22 and John 1:29-50)
For you and me, being a disciple of Jesus is not about being perfect. It’s about direction. A disciple is someone who is moving toward and moving with Jesus. Learning His ways. Trusting His words. Allowing His Spirit to change them from the inside out. We’ll make mistakes along the way. We’ll mess up. But we keep looking to and turning to Jesus.
The same invitation that Jesus gave to his disciples, He has also given to us.
“Come follow me.”
A. What Jesus said about following Him.
Luke 9:23 (NIV) 23 Then he said to them all: “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me.
Note the word “daily.” Discipleship is not a one-time decision you make and then forget about. It’s a daily choice to position your life toward Jesus rather than toward yourself. You are making Him Lord. He is in charge. The cross in this passage isn’t just a symbol of suffering. It’s a symbol of surrender. To take up your cross means to say, “My life is no longer my own.”
(In Jesus’ day, carrying a cross meant you were walking toward death. When Jesus uses this image, He is saying that following Him requires dying to self, to selfish ambitions, to pride, to the need to be in control.)
I felt the Lord ask me one morning, “Who’s driving the car today? It was a question that made me stop and think. Am I going to surrender control today and let God be in charge? I prayed, “Lord, I want you to drive the car every day, help me to give you the keys and let you drive.” And from that day on, I start with a daily invitation to God to be in charge, or to drive the car, so to speak.
Think about the benefits that come as a result of Jesus being in control of where we’re going for the day. A delay, an interruption or a change in plan may seem like an obstacle to me. If I’m driving the car on my own or trying to navigate life by myself, then I face those problems alone and I then seek out the answers on my own, but my answers are always wrong. If I allow Jesus to have control of the car (my life,) what may appear as obstacles to me may just be divine appointments where the Lord wants to do something that I would have never understood or noticed if left to myself. Or those obstacles might be a test that I need to pass that day. Remember, until you pass the test, you’ll continue to retake it. What I might perceive as an obstacle for me might be a blessing for someone else. You never know what the Lord is up to, until you give him an opportunity to do something in you or through you. How many times do you think we’ve missed an opportunity because our heart wasn’t in the right place? Maybe we weren’t listening when we were supposed to be and so we didn’t hear what God wanted to speak. Things like unforgiveness can cause that to happen.
When Jesus drives the car there will still be car trouble, flat tires and traffic. But the way that I deal with those things with Jesus are different than I how I dealt with them in the past on my own strength. At the end of the day, the real treasure of Jesus driving the car or being in control of my life is the relationship and the time spent in His presence. I also recognize and give him glory when I look back at the day and see all that He did for me.
28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.
We want to carry the presence of God where we go because the atmosphere changes when He’s with us. The things that would have normally stolen my joy and my peace don’t have the power they used to. Why? Because I am DAILY inviting the Lord to come and be in control. And what does that mean? It’s Luke 9:23 that we just read. I deny myself. I surrender. My life is not my own. I follow Jesus and what He wants.
B. Disciples – It’s a Marathon, not a Sprint.
No one becomes a mature follower of Jesus overnight. The disciples who walked with Jesus for three years still had moments of doubt, fear and failure. What made them disciples wasn’t their perfection. Far from it. The Bible is full of people who made mistakes and messed up. Can you imagine doing something dumb and people are still reading about it a couple thousand years later?? Again, these were ordinary men. They all had shortcomings and failures, just like us. For most of them, it was their persistence in following Jesus that helped them stay on track. In the same way for us… if we are persistent, if we keep choosing Jesus and repent of our sins, turning away from what is wrong and what is counterfeit and turning towards Him, He IS faithful.
The goal is to stay close to Jesus and keep walking. The reality is that following Jesus is a choice. We choose to follow Jesus when things are easy. We continue to choose when things get hard. With Jesus we do the hard things. Why?? It’s so much better to do hard things with Him than without Him. We choose to follow Jesus when our situation doesn’t make sense. There are still going to be things that happen in our lives that we do not understand. When that happens, we have to remember the character of the Lord. He’s always good. He loves us more than we can fathom.
28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.
C. When Things Got Hard for Disciples
John 6:66-69 (NIV) 66 From this time many of his disciples turned back and no longer followed him. 67 “You do not want to leave too, do you?” Jesus asked the Twelve.
68 Simon Peter answered him, “Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life. 69 We have come to believe and to know that you are the Holy One of God.”
This comes right after Jesus’s famous “Bread of Life” teaching. He had just told the crowd they must eat His flesh and drink His blood to have eternal life. And many of His followers were put off by it. Why? Because they took Him literally and missed the point entirely. The Old Testament Law strictly forbade consuming blood (Leviticus 17:10-14), so to a Jewish audience this was shocking. Jesus was not teaching cannibalism. He was pushing for a deeper response.
In the ancient world, eating something meant to take it into yourself so that it became part of you. That is exactly what Jesus is saying. Don’t just admire Me from far off, like you would be a celebrity. Don’t just agree with My teaching. Take Me into the deepest part of who you are so that I become your very life. “Whoever feeds on me will live because of me” (John 6:57).
Notice who walked away. Not the Twelve. It was a large group of disciples in larger circle who said the teaching was too hard to accept. Here’s why they struggled. Most of us interpret life through physical means. Taste, touch, smell, sight. If we can measure it, we can believe it. But Jesus said in John 6:63, “The Spirit gives life; the flesh counts for nothing. The words I have spoken to you; they are full of the Spirit and life.”
Understanding the things of God requires a spiritual perspective. If you only perceive things in the flesh, you will miss what the Spirit of God is doing.
Here’s what I want you to understand. You are going to encounter hard things. Things that are hard to understand. Things that will cause you to ask why. If you follow Jesus long enough, you’re probably going to experience things that may not make sense to you. You may get hurt along the way. You may experience a setback. You may go through a wilderness season where God is bringing you out of something or some place to bring you into a better place. It may not feel good. There may be things that happen to us that we don’t understand or never figure out the answer to until we get to Heaven. The cost of following Jesus will separate real disciples from casual followers.
Jesus even warns us in John 16:33 …In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”
So, when Jesus turned to the Twelve and asked if they would leave too, Peter gives the answer that every disciple eventually has to give. “Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life.”
2. Counting the Cost of Discipleship
Jesus never tried to make following Him sound easy. In fact, He consistently told people to count the cost before committing. And it’s not because He wanted to scare people away. It’s because He loved them too much to let them follow without knowing what they were getting into. A faith built on misunderstanding won’t survive the hard moments.
Luke 14:27-30 (NIV) 27 And whoever does not carry their cross and follow me cannot be my disciple. 28 “Suppose one of you wants to build a tower. Won’t you first sit down and estimate the cost to see if you have enough money to complete it? 29 For if you lay the foundation and are not able to finish it, everyone who sees it will ridicule you, 30 saying, ‘This person began to build and wasn’t able to finish.’
Jesus is using a simple, practical image here. Before a builder starts, he sits down and figures out what it will take. Jesus is asking us to do the same. Jesus is not trying to talk you out of following Him, but to make sure your commitment is real.
So, what is the cost? Here is the things Jesus most consistently pointed to:
- It will cost you your comfort.
- Following Jesus means you’ll sometimes be called to go places, serve people, or make choices that are inconvenient. The disciples left their fishing nets and followed Jesus to places they never expected to go. Following Jesus may not require you to leave your job. But it will require you to hold everything loosely.
- It will cost you your reputation.
In a culture that’s increasingly skeptical of faith, identifying yourself as a follower of Jesus will sometimes make you stand out. Sometimes it will make you stand alone. Jesus warned His disciples that the world wouldn’t always receive them well (John 15:18-20). So, here’s the question. Does His opinion of you matter more than anyone else’s?
- It will cost you your independence.
Following Jesus means slowly, steadily placing His agenda above your own. In your friendships. In your finances. In your time. In your priorities. John 15:5 (NIV) “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.
We can’t do anything apart from Jesus. He’s in charge. So being a disciple will cost you your independence. There may be situations where it will also cost you your pride, but God will never embarrass you or make you look like a fool. When you let the Spirit of God lead you and speak through you, you can trust Him in that. Don’t ever be afraid to take the risk when you know that God is leading you.
I can tell you from my own experience that there have been times when I have felt uncomfortable. The Lord has nudged me to do things that are unfamiliar, things that have stretched me beyond what I once thought I was capable of.
But here’s what I can testify to. Every single time that I have responded to his gentle nudge, He has empowered me to do what He was asking me to do. And as a result, there’s this trust that is built. I haven’t been perfect. There have been times where I let fear get in the way. But the Lord hasn’t given up on me. As you grow in this, it gets easier. The risks get bigger; the trust becomes greater and so do the rewards for obedience.
The whole point of losing your pride, is so that you can trust that God is who He says He is and He can do what He says He can do, He wants you to partner with Him to see His Kingdom come and His will be done.
The cost is real. But so is the reward.
3. Spiritual Formation (Sanctification)
Spiritual formation sounds complicated, but it is pretty simple. It’s the process by which God shapes you, slowly and over time, into someone who looks more and more like Jesus. The theological word for this is sanctification. He does it through His Holy Spirit working inside you. And He does it through the prayer, reading the Bible, worship, spending time with other believers and serving people. All of it works together.
Here’s what spiritual formation is not.
It’s not self-improvement. It’s not picking a few areas of your life and working on them like a project. It’s not trying harder to be a better person. That’s just willpower with a religious label on it.
Spiritual formation is something different. It’s letting God do the work in you that only God can do. You can’t change your own heart. You can’t make yourself have the fruit of the Spirit. Why?? Because it’s the fruit of the Spirit! Not the fruit of (insert your name here).
Galatians 5:22-23 (NIV) 22 But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against these things!
Notice Paul says “fruit” singular, not “fruits” plural. This is on purpose. He’s not giving a checklist of nine separate qualities you pick and choose from. He’s describing one unified character that grows out of a Spirit-filled life. All of these come as a package deal. You don’t get to keep the kindness and skip the self-control.Only the life-changing power of God can do this. Your job is to submit to His work, even when it doesn’t feel good, and then obedient to it. You’re not the one doing the change. You’re the one being changed. God is the one at work. You just have to walk with Him.
Romans 12:2 (NIV) 2 Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is — his good, pleasing and perfect will.
The word “transformed” here comes from the same root as the word metamorphosis. Think back to high school and your biology class. It’s like the change a caterpillar goes through to become a butterfly. This isn’t a small change. It’s not an upgrade. It’s a complete change from the inside out. And it happens through the renewing or the changing of your mind. By feeding on truth. By praying. By being part of a community. By obeying. Also, be aware of what you feed is what will grow. So if you’re feasting on God, you’re most certainly going to change your mind about the things in your life. You’ll walk differently, talk differently and you’ll think differently.
2 Corinthians 5:17-18 (NIV) 17 Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here! 18 All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation:
A. The Practices that Form Us
Spiritual disciplines are not ways to earn God’s love. They are ways to put yourself in the path of His grace. A plant doesn’t make sunlight. It just turns toward it. (more biology for you) Remember what we just said, “What you feed is what will grow!” That’s what spiritual disciplines do for us. They turn us toward what God is already giving.
- Scripture – Read the Bible regularly.
God speaks through His Word. You cannot be formed by something you do not know. This is why we encouraged you at the end of Week One to begin reading the Gospel of John. Keep going. Start building the habit of daily reading, even if it is just a few verses. (Psalm 119:105 (NIV) Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path.)
- Prayer – Talk to God honestly.
Prayer is not a performance. It is a conversation. Bring God your questions, your fears, your gratitude, and your requests. Jesus modeled a life of prayer. He went away regularly to pray. (Luke 5:16 (NIV) 16 But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed.) Prayer is how you stay connected to the One you are following.
- Community – Do this with others.
You cannot fully grow as a disciple in isolation. God designed us to be formed in community. Hebrews 10:24-25 tells us not to give up meeting together because we need each other’s encouragement, accountability, and example. This group you are in right now is part of that. (Proverbs 27:17 (NIV) As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.)
- Worship – Orient your heart toward God.
Worship is not just singing. It is recognizing who God is and responding accordingly. When you worship, you are reminding your own heart of what is true: that God is good, that He is in control, and that your life belongs to Him.
- Obedience – Do what He says, even when it is hard.
Jesus said in John 14:15, “If you love me, keep my commands.” Obedience isn’t legalism. It’s love you can see. Obedience deepens your faith and pleases God. When you step out and trust God with something real, and you find out He really is faithful, that changes you.
B. Growth is a process, not an event.
Philippians 1:6 (NIV) 6 being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.
God does not start something and abandon it. The same One who began this work in you will see it through. There will be seasons of rapid growth and seasons where you feel like nothing is changing. Both are normal. What matters is that you keep showing up to Scripture, to prayer, to community, to obedience. God will do the rest.
4. Sharing My Faith
One of the natural outflows of real discipleship is a desire to tell others about Jesus. Not because you have to. But because when something changes your life, you want other people to know about it. Sharing your faith isn’t about being an expert. It’s about being a witness. Someone who tells them what they’ve seen and what they’ve experienced.
I am the kind of person that when I discover something good. I just naturally want to tell others about it. With me, it could be a good restaurant, a useful website or something new I learned in the kitchen. How much more, should we desire to share Jesus with others??
1 Peter 3:15 (NIV) 15 But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect…
Notice two things about this verse. First, you’re not called to have all the answers, sometimes you won’t and that’s ok. Take some time to find the answer and get back to the person with the question. You’re called to be able to give a reason for your hope. Your story is your greatest tool. No one can argue with what Jesus has done in your life. It’s your testimony. Second, how you share it matters just as much as what you share, with love and respect. Faith is shared. Not forced.
A. Start with Your Story
The most powerful thing you can share is simply what happened to you. That’s it. Just your story.
Look at the blind man in John 9. Jesus healed him. And the religious leaders came after him hard. They were trying to trap him. They were trying to discredit Jesus. They asked him question after question, trying to get him to slip up. And this man didn’t have seminary training. He didn’t know the science of how Jesus healed him. He couldn’t explain how the miracle happened.
But the answer he gave was very powerful.
John 9:25 (NIV) “One thing I do know. I was blind but now I see!”
He didn’t have to win the argument. He just had to tell the truth. And the truth was simple. Something happened to him. And he wasn’t the same anymore.
That’s a testimony.
Here’s the good news for you. You don’t need a theology degree to share your faith. You don’t need to have all the answers. You don’t need to know how to handle every objection or every hard question. You just need to be willing to say what Jesus has done in your life.
Were you anxious? And now you have peace? Say so.
Were you bitter and angry? And now you’re learning to forgive? Say so.
Were you lost? And now you’ve been found? Say so.
No one can argue with your story. They can disagree with your beliefs. They can push back on your theology. But they can’t tell you that what happened to you didn’t happen. That’s the power of a testimony.
Here is a simple way to think about your story (testimony):
- What was my life like before I encountered Jesus?
- What did I come to understand about who He is?
- What has changed since I started following Him?
B. Live it Before You Say It
Matthew 5:16 (NIV) 16 “In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.”
People in your life are watching before they are listening. The way you treat people, the peace you carry in difficult situations, the generosity and kindness you show, all of that speaks before you ever open your mouth about Jesus. A life that has been genuinely changed is one of the most powerful apologetics there is.
“Apologetics” simply means giving a defense or explanation for your faith.
C. Trust the Holy Spirit to Do the Work in Others
It is not your job to convert anyone. That is God’s work. Your job is to be faithful, to live honestly, to love people well, and to speak when the Holy Spirit tells you. Remember that you’re partnering with God and He will empower you to speak and He will use you to bless others. Jesus promised His disciples in Acts 1:8 that they would receive power when the Holy Spirit came upon them, and that they would be His witnesses. The same Holy Spirit lives in you. You are not doing this alone.
5. Worthy of the Calling
“Worthy of the Calling” is a phrase in the New Testament that shows up more than once. It doesn’t mean earning God’s favor. You can’t earn it. It’s already yours. It means living in a way that reflects what’s been given to you. Matching the inside of who you are in Jesus with the outside of how you live.
Ephesians 4:1-3 (NIV) 1 As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. 2 Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. 3 Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.
A. What Does “Worthy” Look Like?
Paul gives us a practical list right there in the passage. Humility. Gentleness. Patience. Love. Peace. These aren’t personality traits you either have, or you don’t. They’re the fruit that grows when the Holy Spirit is at work in you (Galatians 5:22-23). You grow into them over time. As you stay connected to the vine. And the vine is Jesus (John 15:5).
Living worthy of the calling means:
Treating people the way Jesus treated people.
He gave dignity to the overlooked. He was patient with the slow learners. He was fierce about justice and tender toward the broken. Ask yourself about this on a regular basis. How would Jesus handle this relationship? This conflict? This person right in front of me? We see that God was always there for the widow, the orphan, the immigrant and the poor. If you want to be blessed, then bless these people.
Representing Him honestly and authentically in the ordinary moments.
The most important moments of discipleship are rarely on Sunday morning. They’re at the Monday meeting. The Tuesday traffic jam. The Wednesday argument with someone you love. Those are the moments where what you really believe gets revealed.
Getting back up when you fail.
Living worthy of the calling doesn’t mean never failing. Proverbs 24:16 says, “for though the righteous fall seven times, they rise again.” A disciple who stumbles and repents is still a disciple. The enemy wants you to believe that failure disqualifies you. Jesus says otherwise. Amen!
B. The goal: becoming like Jesus.
Romans 8:29 (NIV) 29 For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters.
This is God’s purpose for every disciple. To be conformed to the image of Jesus. Not to be a copy. But to carry His character. His love. His truth. His compassion. His courage. That’s the destination discipleship that is moving toward. It won’t be complete in this life. But every day, every choice, every moment of surrender is a step in that direction. Who’s driving the car in your life?
Here is the most important thing to remember: you were not saved from doing nothing. A disciple is not a spectator of Jesus or someone who comes to church every Sunday to get a weekly dose of Jesus only to walk out of the building and continue to live like nothing has changed in you. A disciple is someone on the move, learning from Him, being formed by Him, and reflecting Him to the world.
This is not about pressure or performance. It is about relationships. The same Jesus who said, “Take up your cross,” also said, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest” (Matthew 11:28). He calls you to walk with Him and talk with Him. You’ll only discover who you were made to be or your true identity in Him and through Him.
This Week’s Challenges:
- Write out what your life was like before Jesus in two or three sentences. Then write about what has changed in you, and what is different now.
- Find one person in your life you can share your story within a real conversation.
- Pick one spiritual practice from Section 3 (Spiritual Formation) that you are not currently doing consistently and commit to trying it every day for the next seven days. Come back next week ready to share what you have noticed.
Going deeper
Notes and appendices
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